Lost in Space

Hi everyone, thank you to those who have sent me emails over the past six months inquiring of my whereabouts and my well being, it's been awhile.
I'd rather not say where I've been, or whats been happening, none of it is relative to this blog anyway.

A couple of hours ago I logged into all of my email accounts, for the first time in around 6 months. My private accounts contained nothing but spam, no real mail.
Then I logged into my Geekybits email address to discover emails from people all over the world. People asking questions, making comments, wondering were I was, urging me to help them, or to continue writing.
I was amazed, stunned...

Then I started thinking, wow there are more people here who care about me then in real life. So if any of these people knew me in real life how would they treat me?
Would they be like everyone else that I know?
Would they treat me like a badly dressed, unemployed, geek, that sits on her computer all day?
Chances are yes...
In reality I can't get a job, I struggle pay the bills, and I'm not exactly the most social person you'll ever meet. The only good thing in my life, is my wonderful loving husband.

However here, lost in the anonymity of the internet, I'm treated as an authority, as someone who knows their subject and writes clearly about it. Someone worth listening to and asking advice from. It amazes me to think that a few words online can change people perspective.
I'd like to think that I'm learning everyday, that the information that I proved is accurate and correct to the best of my knowledge, yet I had no idea that people actually listened and want to read more. That people respected my opinion and my knowledge. Thank you!

If I'd continued not to write, Geekybits would have faded, another forgotten blog, which no one writes or reads anymore. Irrelevant and unimportant in this fast moving, constantly changing world.
If a blog author was to die would anyone even notice?
Would those post just be suspended in time, lost in the data floating around the net?

This made me think of Donald Crowdis, María Amelia and Olive Riley, three of the worldest oldest bloggers, and if anyone would notice their passing. Perhapes we would notice the passing of Olive as her friend Mike posts for her, yet what of the others? I've read Dons blog many many times, and yet he hasn't written since the 8th of March 2007, I hope sincerely that he is OK, but how would I ever know?

I would like to try to start writing again, no promises on heaps of articles. I think that I have more to share, and more help to give, so stay tuned, Geekybits lives again...

Welcome to 2008

Hello everyone, and welcome to the new year, gee last year seemed to fly by, it's 2008 already.
I really hope that you all have a wonderful year, and learn heaps, and achieve everything you set out too.

I want to go out and really make this year a good one. I want to put it all on the line and not be afraid to lose what I have to achieve my dreams. My fiancé and I, are going to be married this year, which is really exciting, I can't wait. I'm not going to sit around and let this year pass me by, I want to make this year a fun and amazing ride, and I hope it is for all of you as well.

Geekybits³ reached over 100 new readers yesterday, for the first ever time. It feels so wonderful! After all there wouldn't be any point to me writing if no one was reading, yet it still feels very unreal having people interested in what I say.

Thank you to you all, I hope you find my content informative, and useful. Welcome to Geekbits³, and I hope you enjoy the ride.
If anyone has a comment or an idea, or just wants to say G'day, send me and email or drop a comment in the space below.

Thank you all very much, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! From Geekybits³

Unhooked...

Our network has been down for the past few days, therefore no Internet.
I'm not 100% sure exactly what the problem was. It seems that it was partly our ISP's DNS server, partly a dodgy phone line, and partly an operating system which kept changing my settings back to it's settings (it knew what I "really" wanted :s).

Also as a separate issue; our firewall's hardware is dying.
I don't know what I'm going to do with it, I guess I'll have to find the money to buy another computer. That should be fun, what with the thousands of dollars we have coming in right now... (not)

I hate being offline, I forget how hooked I am till I can't get out...
I think at times we rely to much on technology. It kinda makes me wonder what we did before computers, before plastic...

Gee I feel cynical and sarcastic tonight, it must be all the fun I've been having...
Life what an interesting little mind fuck... ;)

A fresh start

Now that I have realised that my lack of confidence isn't because of my own inadequacy, it's much easier to move on. I can't blame anyone else for my low self-esteem. For if I don't have confidence in myself no one else will.

I want to make a fresh start!

My partner and I are going to start our own business. We're heavily researching this topic. We want to go in with our eyes open. Having everything in place before jumping in. I'm so excited. I really think that this is going to be brilliant.

I didn't really want to have a job anyway. I was only after the experience in the industry. Yet after reading this article: 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job, I KNOW we can do this.

I have a new found drive to get on with my life. I'm sick of listening to the naysayers the critics. I'll never get anywhere if I keep allowing people to tell me I can't.

Pay no attention to what the critics say. A statue has never been erected in honour of a critic.
~Jean Sibelius

I'm only hurting myself! It will probably take me a while to not look at myself through others eyes. Yet if I don't start trying I will never get anywhere.

Lack of confidence

I feel like I have had a massive wake-up call today. After reading the following article: Gender Differences: Recognizing and Developing Potential in Female Students. I realised many things about the way I have been feeling.

Before I went to TAFE Tasmania I knew what I knew. I was confident when it came to computing. I was actually proud of my abilities. If you know me; you'll know that's a pretty big deal.

After I started TAFE my confidence dropped. At times almost completely. I'm not even sure about something when I KNOW the answer. Pretty silly aye.

I feel like I was set-up to fail at TAFE. All the projects I was asked to do were impossible to pass. Even when I explained why they where impossible I was made to do them anyway.
What got me was the teachers were then shocked, and disappointed when I failed the tasks. In the end I was made to feel like I only graduated by the good graces of one of the teachers. I was shown over and over again that I couldn't compete in the IT industry, and that my skills where highly inadequate.

I don't know why they teach IT here in Tasmania, as there is NO IT industry, which kinda makes a Technical diploma mute. That probably makes my diplomas worthless. Yet I digress.

After reading this article I have realised that it's perhaps not my abilities at fault. Perhaps it is more that my confidence has taken a massive knock. Perhaps it is more the way that I learn, and how that has not been nourished.
I feel as though I have been letting all of this get to me so badly. At times I'm even worried to do things on my own network.

Also when I think back to my schooling, I might have let it get to me there as well. I am a very logical, and technically minded person. Yet I left college (Year 11 and 12 in Australia) thinking that I would be lucky if I was smart enough to even wash dishes.

Now I have a new outlook on all of this. I want to start believing in my abilities again. I want to find a way to build up my confidence. I know that it'll be hard. I probably need to achieve something small to help bring it back up.
Yet I am grateful that I have realised that it probably isn't my abilities, and knowledge. Maybe I can do this. I guess time will tell.

What do you think?

Yesterday I was looking at: freshgasflow.com. There are some very interesting things to examine. This page here particularly intrigued me:
Which one is Booba ?

Have a look at it and see what you think. I have my own theories, yet I would LOVE to hear what other people think.

Why do you think nearly 100% of people chose the same one?

Women in Computing: addition

I was just reading my rant from the other day and I feel I need to make an addition.

I have never been treated unfairly by people online or in the IT industry. Only in some computer stores, and by others in the community, especially in businesses. I don't really know why.
Yet I don't want to whine about it anymore.

I just wanted that to be clear! Thanks...

Women and computing

Take a deep breath this may well be painful. I need to have a little rant...
I'm sick of being treated like shit because I'm a woman in IT. Don't get me wrong I don't think that I should get special treatment or anything like that, I just wish I existed...

I wish that I didn't always have to prove myself over and above others, just to have my knowledge used against me. I wish that it didn't matter! I don't want it to be an us or them thing. I just want to work with computers, because I LOVE it. It shouldn't matter that I'm female.

I graduated top of my class last year. All the rest of my peers were male, and all now have jobs. I don't, I haven't even had an interview. Maybe there are other factors. Perhaps I'm missing the real reason.

Yesterday I walked into a computer shop. I needed a sound card for my fathers computer. I looked around for a minute, then went and stood by the counter. The all male staff were hurrying around. I stood there.

Then a male customer entered the store, within 20 seconds he was served. So I tried more frantically to gain the attention of an attendant. Nothing...
Then two males walked in together and were served straight away, I couldn't believe it. In the end I had to say load enough for the attendants to hear. "Hello, don't I exist here."

After about a minute an attendant walked up to me and said, "Do you want something do you?" I should have walked out, but there was nowhere else to go. He continued to be arrogant the entire time I was in the store. I walked out and burst into tears. All this is really getting to me at the moment.

I don't understand. I don't think being a women takes away from my ability to work with computers. I don't think that I have less knowledge than others in my situation. I don't think I act like I know it all. I certainly don't push the fact that I'm a woman in anyones face. So why do I get treated like this?

Is this a problem just here in Launceston Tasmania?
Are there other places in Australia were women feel like this?
Are there other places in the world were people feel like this?
Or is all of this just in my head? And women get treated the same as there male counterparts.

I'm sorry I'm just fed up with being nothing and nobody, and being treated like crap doesn't help. All I want is to work in the IT industry yet no one wants to give me a chance.

Adventures in Windows

On Wednesday my father rang me with another computer problem. Yet this time was different; he was fed up. He said he was driving up to my place on the weekend (a two and a half hour drive) to drop the computer for me to fix.

I didn't know how serious he was until the next day a letter arrived in the mail, explaining some of the problems he`s been having, and all the info he thought I would need about his computer and the programs on it (He is well trained :). I did some research on the info he gave me. I had a plan of attack in mind before he even arrived.

But we all know how well things follow the plan...

The Plan:

1. Have a quick look around his current install, and perhaps show him whats going wrong.
2. Go to computer store and purchase: a new Hard Drive, and a copy of Windows XP professional.
3. Install new hardware.
4. Install Windows XP Pro on it's own partition.
5. Create partitions for: documents and pictures, backups, and downloads.
6. Install programs for security, antivirus, and spyware.
7. Re-install his needed programs.
8. Lock down and configure all of his software.
9. Make a slipstream disk for disaster recovery.

On Friday dad arrived, computer in hand. We got straight to work plugging everything in. I booted into his Windows XP install.
Well boot is a nice way of putting it... It took about 10 minutes to boot, and even then the errors were amazing, the hard drive and CPU didn't stop spinning.

After about 20 minutes of waiting to open a program, I started Spybot Search & destroy and killed nearly all of the 30+ programs that were starting at boot. After rebooting dad's computer was way faster.

After explaining what was going on to him, and showing him a few things. I explained my plan of attack, he was really happy with it. He loved the idea of having a full windows install. He doesn't want to go to Vista yet. He was happy to know that he could purchase an update disk when he is ready. Yet for now he wants to stay with XP.

He wanted 2GB of RAM, because as a photographer and photography teacher he runs some very memory intensive programs like Photoshop. So we wondered off to the computer shop. He brought:

• A 320GB Western Digital Hard Drive = $155
• 2 x 1GB Sticks of Samsung RAM = $110 each
• A copy of Windows XP Professional OEM = $220

He was really happy with these, so we came hope and I started to install the hardware.

Then everything went wrong...

Lost inside dad's reality distortion field, I've only just crawled out. He stayed until Saturday night, and everything was going wrong until he left. Daz and I just could figure out what was going on. First it appeared we had a dodgy RAM stick, then that the BIOS battery was flat, then something else...

All the time the symptoms were changing, the inconsistency's was unlike anything I have seen from a computer before. I was so incredibly confused and frustrated. I had Daz telling me one thing, then dad telling me another, and in the end I think I was trying the same things over and over again. With dad touching, moving and playing with everything.

Hitting the reset...

Finally dad left. After resting for a couple of hours. I had a look at the computer again.
With in ten minutes I realised exactly what the problem was. The BIOS had not me upgraded to support 2GB of RAM. The motherboard is capable of supporting it, but the BIOS isn't. I'm going to have to flash the BIOS.
I have never done it before. It should be interesting. I have to admit it frightens me a little.

I have installed Windows XP Professional on the new hard drive, I am quite impressed with it so far. It is way better than the Spyware filled OEM Home version I worked in last. It is very strange being back in Windows. I haven't forgotten how to use it though :)

Private work area

Yesterday and today I have been moving our computer room around. My partner and I both needed more privacy. It wasn't working the way that it was. So after discussing a few layouts we decided on one that would work for us both.

Now I have my own little area, pictured left. It feels very strange at the moment, like all new things do. In fact at the moment it feels so strange that it is almost like I have a new computer.

I am happy that we decided to move everything, it works much better this way. Hopefully I will feel more comfortable working here. I didn't feel right the other way. It is hard to work properly when you feel uncomfortable.

Happenings

I've been very busy lately, but I haven't fallen off the face of the planet yet...
I haven't been doing very geeky things though, mostly life shit. Hopefully I will have some more time from now on. I have so many things that I want to do, I just have to prioritize my work.

OpenBSD 4.1
I have decided to give OpenBSD 4.1 a spin, it has been out since the 1st May. I haven't had a chance to try it yet. I just finished creating and burning the ISO to CD. I followed the steps in this post: Creating an OpenBSD 4.0 bootable install CD, Changing "4.0" to "4.1". Also in this post, I say to test it on a CD-rw which isn't a very good suggestion because some CD players wont boot from a CD-rw. So please be careful!

Init and BSD
I have been reading three posts by Dru Lavigne talking about the differences in controlling and initiating programs at boot time in the BSD's:

• When inittab doesn't exist
• rc scripts without runlevels
• No runlevels??!!

I think they are worth a read, especially if you coming from a Linux background.

Back to BSD

Well I am back in FreeBSD. It has taken me a while to build everything from source, using the FreeBSD ports system, yet I am happy and it feels like I'm home. It will take me a while to get everything back to normal, I've only ever ran FreeBSD 6.2 as a server not a Desktop, so it should be interesting to view the changes.

I have been really busy while my desktop has been installing. I rebuilt my VMware server because I wasn't happy with it's configuration, which went really well. I'm so happy with the results! (I wish I'd done it sooner) I have cleaned my house, plus I have been out and about traveling around in the car.

It has been strange not being able to sit down at my computer and simply login and do my things. I haven't even got my rss reader, and all my admin tools up and going yet. Hopefully I should have time over the weekend to finish setting it all up.
I am going to make myself an install disk this time :)
Well thats it for me today, have a good one :)

Why blame technology? again!

I was reading Regina Lynn post today: Breath of Fresh Air: Internet Not Evil, which linked to the following article: It’s the people - stupid.
I thought it was an interesting continuation on my post the other day:
Why blame technology for bad behavior?

Why blame technology for bad behavior?

I would like to congratulate the Victorian government once again on their fear based, knee-jerk reaction to the Internet and computers. Victoria is an Australian state, and it has decided to ban YouTube in government run schools. Supposedly in a bid to stamp out bullying.
Why on earth are people still so scared of computers?
Why do they blame technology for other problems?
Why do they think by banning a web site they can stop anything?
Plus what on earth does bulling have to do with YouTube in the first place?
Wont students just go and look this stuff up at home if they are banned at school?
Doesn't this type of behavior just cause a Streisand effect?

There was no YouTube when I was at school, and I had the same 4-5 girls bully me as apart of my everyday high school experience. I don't think technology had anything to do with that, actually I'm sure of it!

Why aren't we teaching children how to use the Internet? and what to do if they come across inappropriate material. Teaching them to filter themselves, to know what is right and wrong for them. Banning things from people only causes a Streisand effect, and covetous behavior.
Why aren't we finding out why kids are bullying and put a stop to it? (Or at least effort.)
Why do we censor children instead of teaching them?
How can you teach a child to grow and become their own person if they are being banned from things, having their freedom taken from them?
How can you show trust in children when you haven't shown them how to take care of themselves?

Haven't educators/parents realized that "I am what ever you say I am"! If you treat people a certain way then they are eventually going to act that way. It is simple human psychology.

The ONLY thing school teaches you is; your place, it teaches you to follow. Any original thought is squashed, and individuality heavily discouraged. When I entered school, I could read at a 6 grade level, I was quite smart. Smart enough that I scared the teachers into ringing my parents, and threatening them for what I knew. Then I was in trouble from both teachers and parents over and over again, until finally in grade 3 I gave up. I didn't do the work, I stopped learning, and I became a quiet kid that no one knew, and they all left me alone (well until high school). I'm still catching up for all that time lost. I still consider myself to be stupid, after all; "I am what ever you say I am".

Schools are only damaging our children, turning them into sheeple, that follow, and can't make decisions for themselves. Sheeple that you can't trust to do anything without holding their hand, "trained monkeys" (as I have heard a school teacher describe his students). What educators, and governments are failing to realize is that children are way better at computers, and technology than most adults.
Personally I am not at all amazed to watch a child use a computer, show me a person in there 80's or 90's using it, then I will be impressed.

We should be helping teach our children, not sending them off to some strange place and having others squash their potential, and worse! Imagine all of the brilliant minds lost in formal education. Adults that are now to scared (or to well trained) to use any individual thought.

Congratulations again to the Victorian government, for showing us that fear of technology, lack of understanding and knowledge, has once again lead to censoring our children, instead of teaching them. After all isn't the student also the teacher?

The following links are on similar topics, if you get a chance some of them are very interesting: Protect the Children From Porn , THE PSYCHOPATHIC SCHOOL , Bullying in schools.

Happenings

The past weeks happenings have certainly been interesting ones. My partner and I have been fixing up our car, getting new tires, and doing general maintenance. As well as fixing a couple of problems; including a massive crack in the radiator. I learned how to solder big things. I have only ever done electronic soldering before, so this was really interesting.

I have also been having next door neighbor problems! I forgot that helping people is a crime. My partner and I helped the 86 year old lady next door, and ever since we have had one drama after another with her husband, and daughter. It went to the extent of having to call the police last week. I don't understand why some people are like this. I think respect has gone out the window.

Speaking of lack of respect; My partners eldest boy turned up at our place on Friday night, on his motorcycle, with learners plates, and proceeded to pull a beer from is jacket and drink it.
I couldn't believe it! Not only didn't he have any respect for his father, but he had no respect for the fact that we don't drink. Nor the fact that it is illegal for a sixteen year old to drink, or to ride a motorcycle on "L's" with any alcohol in his/her system. He had no comprehension of how he could kill someone or himself doing this.
He's normally a good boy, and I certainly don't want to put him down in anyway. I just don't understand where the lack of respect comes from. It seems that this type of behavior is common place among so many people these days.
What has happened to having respect for yourself and others? Has the school system crushed this from our kids as well now?

Self Corruption

So much for the last couple of days. I got caught out in the rain and since then I have been really unwell. I am feeling a little better today so I thought I should come and write down some of the things in my head.

My Writing
I often get disappointed about my writing. I always think it could be so much more; that I could put things in a more accurate, descriptive and or thoughtful way. Often I don't feel like I have said what I `wanted to say'. I have been thinking about this problem, and I believe that there are two things that cause me to feel this way. These two problems certainly effect other areas of my life and not just my writing, yet today I just want to look at my writing.

Firstly I'm a perfectionist, and everything I do is not perfect, in fact nothing I do lives up to the expectation I place upon it. This is such a flaw in my thinking. I don't treat anyone else this way. I don't expect anything from anyone. Yet of myself I expect unreasonable and often impossible things.
I need to start treating everything I do as a learning experience! and stop trying to reach unreachable ideals. As this attitude only leads to disappointment, due to either not completing the task at all, or not being happy with it, and feeling as though it is never completed.

Secondly I believe the other problem is that I don't want to get personal. I'm a very private person and I don't like to give to much away about myself. Yet this leads to a number of problems;

• It totally corrupts the creative process and leads to opinions and ideas being stifled and filtered.
• Also no one knows who I am. I don't have a online nor a professional identity that is known.
• In not wanting praise for my work no one even knows who completed it, and I don't get more work from it.

Therefore I have no work, no money and no one knows me, Purely because I am not putting myself out there. This is a problem!!!
I need to say hey world this is me and this is what I can do. Otherwise I'll never get anywhere.

Navel Gazing

Have you missed me?
I have taken the last couple of weeks off to do some thinking. I have even had a few days away from the computer. I felt I needed this time. I needed to figure lots of things out. I still need to figure out heaps more, yet I think I am nearly on the right path now.
I will be discussing some of the things that I have been thinking about and some of the decisions that I have made over the next couple of days.

Geeky Bits³
Today I want to touch on the topic of my blog: Geekybits. One of the things that I wanted to figure out was exactly what my blog is for. At the moment I feel as though it's is all over the place, even I'm not sure what it is about.
This is not good!
It makes things hard on me and you! So from now on I am going to keep my blog for the purpose of expressing my opinion to my readers. Although I think that I will still do the occasional review, I want to keep things on topic. I want this to be a place to express myself, especially my geeky bits :)
I don't think this will be a very huge change, and it should make life easier on everyone concerned.
I hope you continue reading ... Cheers Kris

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life
(from Monty Python's the meaning of life)
words and music by Eric Idle

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...

Imagine

I have been busy these last couple of days playing with an internal LAN setup. It has been down right painful. I "love" GUI's which "know" what I really want *rolling eyes*. Every time I have it working just fine, I move on, and then within 10-30 Min's everything goes to shit.

That's not all, there have been a couple of personal things which have been plaguing me. All up I just can't seem to get it together at the moment. Not that I am complaining. There are so many hundreds of thousands of millions of people suffering more than I. I am just forgetting to look on the bright side of life.

Today here in Australia it is: Australia Day. A day on which we celebrate the slaughter of thousands of native people. What is this society coming to?
When are people going to see that we can't live this way? Humans will not survive if we don't work together. What makes Humans so powerful is that we have the capacity to work together, as a group, a collective. We could achieve so many things.

• Imagine how great our knowledge would be if we shared it between us all. (even the "sacred texts" the medical research papers, the things that others have decided that the public can't handle.)
  
• Imagine how far the space program would be if there where no monetary concerns.
• Imagine the new inventions which would develop if ideas where not locked down by massive companies, who have no intention of developing them.
• Imagine if ideas were free.
  
• Imagine the computer systems, if the company's shared ideas, and worked together.
• Imagine if children were not forced into institutions to learn "their place", but were treasured, their skills encouraged and their ideas listened to.
• Imagine if there was no money! No hording of possessions. So that some have all and most have none.
  
• Imagine if we lived with equality!
• Imagine that it didn't matter were you where born or how much money your family had. And that you still had a chance to share yourself with the world, to give to humanity, and your opinions counted.
• Imagine if we didn't step on the intelligent people, and make them feel worthless, and hopeless, that we encouraged there talents, and used there skills to help further humanity.
  
• Imagine the peace, the love, the laughing, the fun, the knowledge.
• Imagine having a friend who didn't want something from you.

Just imagine. I know I'm a dreamer.

I just don't get this society. I don't understand why we don't working together for the good of every one. The earth is not going to be around forever. We need to spread out, or humans will not survive. When are we going to stop these petty squabbles over land, money, religion, and realize that we are all human! We are the same species, and furthering our species should be more important than, money, actors, clothes, what fred is doing, guilt, or trying to be something society says is right.

Simple Plan - Crazy:

Slow Internet connection

Over the past couple of days our Internet connection has been ridiculously slow. Some web pages have been taking 5 minutes to load and that's if they load at all. Downloading anything has been virtually impossible. I don't know what's been happening, but it wasn't a problem on our end. So it must have been an ISP problem. Luckily it has heaps better today. Hopfully I can get some more work done.

I hate slow Internet connections. It reminds me of dial-up *shudder*. Not that our connection is that great. Hopefully it will be one of the first things to be updated when we have more money coming in :).